as a parent of a child, I have been trying to be transparent with her about my own endeavors to notice when my internet use is supporting me or when it is going beyond my ability to metabolize or integrate anything in intaking. it's an ebb and flow, I want to help model that for her rather than just cutting her off from the process of learning that herself by policing her internet use. policing doesn't get us anywhere, and I think the lawmaking route doesn't really empower people to learn about thier own nervous systems thru trial and error
I had a visceral reaction to the chapter in Karderas's book on "The Sociogenic Trans Effect." I suppose the groundwork has always been there to merge the "technology is harming the youth" camp and the "kids are being convinced they're trans" camp, but it terrifies me. I see the former being a pathway into the latter for those who don't know any better, because the former has widespread appeal and also some truth to it. I think of my dad, who is a smart, progressive person but also a fan of Huberman and Dopamine Nation because he's kind of an optimize bro - I could absolutely see him reading that book and not completely dismissing that chapter, although I'd hope he would be skeptical because he knows me (I'm trans) and has had to learn about trans people long before the most recent "trans panic."
Also for some reason Substack app isn't letting me copy text but there was a line at footnote 2 that I thought was so so wonderful, where you essentially explained the rise in mental health problems as a function of a bunch of wicked problems, etc. I want to memorize it so I can quote it constantly. I cringe when people bring up the "mental health epidemic" or talk about how "we need better mental health care" - people tend to think individuals are just more broken and if we could just get everyone into therapy, all would be well. As a therapist, I would argue that's not true. MOST of the things that are harming people I can do nothing about, other than sit with them in their pain. Would it be great if everyone could access therapy? Absolutely. But it would not solve the "mental health epidemic."
Also, I would totally read a summary of that dumb book because I can't hate read things (too stressful) and know thine enemy etc. and genuinely I'd read anything you wanted to write on the subject!
So awesome as always. Made me think quite a bit, and gave me different perspectives to chew on.
I haven’t been on social media in about 2 years, save for some occasional reddit, because I tend to have no self control with scrolling. I definitely used it in a personally harmful way for many years, and I got tired of doing that to myself. But I do really miss being able to connect with friends.
As embarrassing as this is to admit, I’ve found myself wanting to blame social media corporations and enact revenge. But I’m realizing that this problem is much more nuanced than what my knee jerk reaction of block/ban/control. And acting from that place of fear and anger is not at all a good primer for helpful change. From my experience, this isn’t an uncommon response for people in their first few years of sobriety/distance from any substance. I’ve noticed and talked to a lot of people that are clean from x, y, z for 1-2 years that fall down these rabbit holes of how corrupt and evil these substances and the corporations that peddle them are. This is not to say that they are totally unfounded in their claims, but it’s to say that swinging to the side of blocking/banning/criminalizing/demonizing isn’t really the answer to these problems. Don’t know exactly where I was trying to go with this, but I do think it’s fascinating that we go from one extreme to the other, and that finding balance in these situations is difficult. I’m always thankful for the people trying to think critically across the board with multiple perspectives, instead of trying to impose their own beliefs onto everyone.
And my heart breaks for the trans people and trans kids whose parents are involved in shit like 4thwavenow. I cannot believe that there are parents that are so unwilling to deal with their fear of unknowns that they’d rather reject their kids/who they are and spew hate about them. About their own children. Sad.
Some of this made LOL. Like you, I think there's something there re phone addiction and kids (and adults) but, BUT, it's all about each individual and their personal situation/background.
These blanket statements and solutions are literally that, and often based on worse case scenarios. There's never any nuances, just a fear based approach.
And as you say, there's always been something adults fret about, mainly because they don't understand it and or can't control it.
as a parent of a child, I have been trying to be transparent with her about my own endeavors to notice when my internet use is supporting me or when it is going beyond my ability to metabolize or integrate anything in intaking. it's an ebb and flow, I want to help model that for her rather than just cutting her off from the process of learning that herself by policing her internet use. policing doesn't get us anywhere, and I think the lawmaking route doesn't really empower people to learn about thier own nervous systems thru trial and error
Fantastic, as always!
I had a visceral reaction to the chapter in Karderas's book on "The Sociogenic Trans Effect." I suppose the groundwork has always been there to merge the "technology is harming the youth" camp and the "kids are being convinced they're trans" camp, but it terrifies me. I see the former being a pathway into the latter for those who don't know any better, because the former has widespread appeal and also some truth to it. I think of my dad, who is a smart, progressive person but also a fan of Huberman and Dopamine Nation because he's kind of an optimize bro - I could absolutely see him reading that book and not completely dismissing that chapter, although I'd hope he would be skeptical because he knows me (I'm trans) and has had to learn about trans people long before the most recent "trans panic."
Also for some reason Substack app isn't letting me copy text but there was a line at footnote 2 that I thought was so so wonderful, where you essentially explained the rise in mental health problems as a function of a bunch of wicked problems, etc. I want to memorize it so I can quote it constantly. I cringe when people bring up the "mental health epidemic" or talk about how "we need better mental health care" - people tend to think individuals are just more broken and if we could just get everyone into therapy, all would be well. As a therapist, I would argue that's not true. MOST of the things that are harming people I can do nothing about, other than sit with them in their pain. Would it be great if everyone could access therapy? Absolutely. But it would not solve the "mental health epidemic."
Also, I would totally read a summary of that dumb book because I can't hate read things (too stressful) and know thine enemy etc. and genuinely I'd read anything you wanted to write on the subject!
So awesome as always. Made me think quite a bit, and gave me different perspectives to chew on.
I haven’t been on social media in about 2 years, save for some occasional reddit, because I tend to have no self control with scrolling. I definitely used it in a personally harmful way for many years, and I got tired of doing that to myself. But I do really miss being able to connect with friends.
As embarrassing as this is to admit, I’ve found myself wanting to blame social media corporations and enact revenge. But I’m realizing that this problem is much more nuanced than what my knee jerk reaction of block/ban/control. And acting from that place of fear and anger is not at all a good primer for helpful change. From my experience, this isn’t an uncommon response for people in their first few years of sobriety/distance from any substance. I’ve noticed and talked to a lot of people that are clean from x, y, z for 1-2 years that fall down these rabbit holes of how corrupt and evil these substances and the corporations that peddle them are. This is not to say that they are totally unfounded in their claims, but it’s to say that swinging to the side of blocking/banning/criminalizing/demonizing isn’t really the answer to these problems. Don’t know exactly where I was trying to go with this, but I do think it’s fascinating that we go from one extreme to the other, and that finding balance in these situations is difficult. I’m always thankful for the people trying to think critically across the board with multiple perspectives, instead of trying to impose their own beliefs onto everyone.
And my heart breaks for the trans people and trans kids whose parents are involved in shit like 4thwavenow. I cannot believe that there are parents that are so unwilling to deal with their fear of unknowns that they’d rather reject their kids/who they are and spew hate about them. About their own children. Sad.
Some of this made LOL. Like you, I think there's something there re phone addiction and kids (and adults) but, BUT, it's all about each individual and their personal situation/background.
These blanket statements and solutions are literally that, and often based on worse case scenarios. There's never any nuances, just a fear based approach.
And as you say, there's always been something adults fret about, mainly because they don't understand it and or can't control it.
Great post 🙌🏻
The part about comic books is so interesting. I know some other similar stuff from tech history/culture but I hadn't learned that one before.
Fuckin Anna Lembke! Like a bad fuckin penny!
This is stunning. Thank you so much. I feel oddly hopeful and I think I really needed that. A lot of us do.
This is brilliant. Made me think and gave me some reading recommendations as well.