Wow, I am both totally floored and flattered that you created this wonderful piece that converses so actively with the book, god do I love to see art in collaboration with other art, *and* I'm struck with the fact that by quoting from you in my books, I've denied you a bit of that opportunity to step away from the public eye when it comes to writing about Autism. The stories that we've told and the processing that we've both done out in public have both become these...things... that exist outside of us. I haven't always had the reigns on how much I share or where I share from, either. And it's hard sometimes to tell the difference between throwing back the veil of shame to be openly unabashed in oneself, and...searching for yet another way to try and dazzle and elide and over-justify my own and others' existence for an external audience.
So much of what you have written about neurodivergence and related topics has brought such clarity to me, where before there was only shame and confusion. It happens both in the little details that are so recognizable, and in your theoretical approach, which has given so many of us a new way of venturing into discussions about neurodivergence that weren't getting anywhere useful before. I'm very happy to see the conversation between our bodies of work continuing on in this way. I'm so lucky to know you!
🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭 I am really glad that you made me a part of Unmasking! these are historic books in the autism canon imo and I am just happy to be here. It is such a weird experience to encounter people interacting with a thing that you made that is a version of you but also not fully actually you… it always freaks me out a little, but idk how to write or make things without using my own life as part of the text, and I think that’s kinda the role of the artist, to be a vessel or mirror or interpreter of human experience. So it’s unavoidable! but still really weird! and esp made more immediate by the internet I think, bc of the way it facilitates really direct artist/audience relationships.
Anyway this is a really meta convo to be having in a comment section 😂😂 thank you for sharing so much of yourself with us, and for always being such a passionate supporter of my work, your encouragement over the years has helped me so much!
“Sometimes I worry that I’m not really autistic,” I said. Hard relate. This is a layer of shame that exists outwith other layers of neurodivergent shame.
“But then comes the horrifying realization that you are being widely seen, maybe before you have even figured it all out for yourself.”
This really resonates. I was so excited to find out that my difficulties in life were not all in my head or something I was faking when I got diagnosed in 2021 that I disclosed it right away to most in my circle, even online. In retrospect I wish I’d waited until I knew myself more fully in this true and proper identity.
yes same. the amount I judge others for their worth, only as a way to protect my own insecurities. just journaled about what I spend my time on, and yes, it's ruminating about any tricky interaction or how other people may be feeling. also??? the line between and within and encompassing autism and OCD is frustrating. I've given myself permission to count everything all the time now because it soothes my brain.
I am so thankful for your writing and research, Jesse. Apparently I really needed to hear your thoughts about unmasking autism today, just like I really need to read both of Dr. Devon Price's books back to back *asap*.
Okay UNCANNY but just yesterday I had the “oh I work with special needs kids/some people have INVISIBLE disabilities” interaction while picking up Unmasking for Life at the B&N checkout counter….didnt take the bait to disclose and it fully felt like a mob boss standoff
I really enjoyed Devon's books as well and have recommended it several times to others. I'm glad to hear there is a new one coming out.
The thing that gets me about masking is how downright dangerous it is when it comes to burnout. So if talking about it and being an advocate influencer helps a person stay sane, by all means, do it and do it often!
Wow, I am both totally floored and flattered that you created this wonderful piece that converses so actively with the book, god do I love to see art in collaboration with other art, *and* I'm struck with the fact that by quoting from you in my books, I've denied you a bit of that opportunity to step away from the public eye when it comes to writing about Autism. The stories that we've told and the processing that we've both done out in public have both become these...things... that exist outside of us. I haven't always had the reigns on how much I share or where I share from, either. And it's hard sometimes to tell the difference between throwing back the veil of shame to be openly unabashed in oneself, and...searching for yet another way to try and dazzle and elide and over-justify my own and others' existence for an external audience.
So much of what you have written about neurodivergence and related topics has brought such clarity to me, where before there was only shame and confusion. It happens both in the little details that are so recognizable, and in your theoretical approach, which has given so many of us a new way of venturing into discussions about neurodivergence that weren't getting anywhere useful before. I'm very happy to see the conversation between our bodies of work continuing on in this way. I'm so lucky to know you!
🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭 I am really glad that you made me a part of Unmasking! these are historic books in the autism canon imo and I am just happy to be here. It is such a weird experience to encounter people interacting with a thing that you made that is a version of you but also not fully actually you… it always freaks me out a little, but idk how to write or make things without using my own life as part of the text, and I think that’s kinda the role of the artist, to be a vessel or mirror or interpreter of human experience. So it’s unavoidable! but still really weird! and esp made more immediate by the internet I think, bc of the way it facilitates really direct artist/audience relationships.
Anyway this is a really meta convo to be having in a comment section 😂😂 thank you for sharing so much of yourself with us, and for always being such a passionate supporter of my work, your encouragement over the years has helped me so much!
“Sometimes I worry that I’m not really autistic,” I said. Hard relate. This is a layer of shame that exists outwith other layers of neurodivergent shame.
I keep wanting to read these and forgetting about them so requesting #1 from my library right now
Gawd I am relating to this on such a cellular level.
“I took a deep breath and packed my catastrophes into my backpack with me”
lol how dare you call me out like that
“But then comes the horrifying realization that you are being widely seen, maybe before you have even figured it all out for yourself.”
This really resonates. I was so excited to find out that my difficulties in life were not all in my head or something I was faking when I got diagnosed in 2021 that I disclosed it right away to most in my circle, even online. In retrospect I wish I’d waited until I knew myself more fully in this true and proper identity.
I am waking up in the dream of my shame.
yes same. the amount I judge others for their worth, only as a way to protect my own insecurities. just journaled about what I spend my time on, and yes, it's ruminating about any tricky interaction or how other people may be feeling. also??? the line between and within and encompassing autism and OCD is frustrating. I've given myself permission to count everything all the time now because it soothes my brain.
I am so thankful for your writing and research, Jesse. Apparently I really needed to hear your thoughts about unmasking autism today, just like I really need to read both of Dr. Devon Price's books back to back *asap*.
Always looking forward to more of your words.
Okay UNCANNY but just yesterday I had the “oh I work with special needs kids/some people have INVISIBLE disabilities” interaction while picking up Unmasking for Life at the B&N checkout counter….didnt take the bait to disclose and it fully felt like a mob boss standoff
wow extremely validated by the oversharing take ty
Just got both ebooks!
Divine timing. phewww
I really enjoyed Devon's books as well and have recommended it several times to others. I'm glad to hear there is a new one coming out.
The thing that gets me about masking is how downright dangerous it is when it comes to burnout. So if talking about it and being an advocate influencer helps a person stay sane, by all means, do it and do it often!